As far as a starting point is concerned ask yourself this.  In the Moment, what choice have I made?  Do I choose to believe my thoughts, my patterns of behavior, my reactions?  Or do I choose to ‘see’ all that garbage and choose to Be?  You cannot choose to Be without letting go of all that stuff.  That is the problem, our fascination and presumed ‘need’ to do something. Sometimes the best thing we can do is nothing.  Nothing, because we see the ‘stuff’ but it is too compelling to do anything but watch.  ‘Nothing’ in this case, is better than giving in and acting out the rhythm of the pattern.  To get the right starting point, seeing or awareness (aka mindfulness) is paramount.  ‘Seeing” is optimized in the Moment.  ‘Seeing’ is compromised when we are being artificial and in the unreality of the past (“I hate myself for doing that.”) and in the unreality of the future (“I’m mad as hell about that and I’m going to show him”.)  So, first ground yourself in the Moment by breathing and hooking up with your body.  (Your body is always in the Moment.)  Ask yourself deeply if everything is ‘ok’ right now.  The answer is not cognitive, it “IS” and it is “yes”, everything is ok right now (Because it is).  Feel the connection to the space deep inside you, the quietness.  Choose to be with that and carry that with you every moment (or whenever possible).  This is the choice we are making literally every moment.  Be the Moment.  Daddy’O