When the pain of rejection hits you on your journey through life, where does it hurt? When someone disses you inappropriately in traffic, where do you feel the pain? When a close family member challenges you with hostility on very minor stuff, why is there ‘that pain’? What can we do with our felt reaction to any like scenario that wallops us for no good reason?
See it, feel it, see it again and again until the’ looking’ reveals and relieves. There is no changing the scenario. There is changing the reaction/action. And there is changing our use of our awareness.
As usual, being in the current moment helps. However, the past scenario does not exist there. It exists in the mind and its twisted turn of creating a false reality which causes us to suffer, unnecessarily, in the present.
Getting into the moment is a conundrum when we choose the built-in suffering of false reality. Ergo, the strategy is to facilitate a return to ‘real’ reality.
What do we need to see?
We need to see that the suffering is holding with us because we continue to instruct ourselves to believe we are the construct called the ‘ego’. If there were no ego, then there would not be this hurt we are carrying around with us continually. Therefore, when we feel this non-physical pain, we can confirm that the ‘ego’ is still very present. The pain does not really exist in the Moment except through the ego.
Our rejoinder may be that we ‘know’ that we are not the ego. But the pain still persists. That doesn’t help! The pain complicates things seemingly. But really, the pain is just underscoring our preferences.
We do not prefer pain (usually) but we do believe we are the ego and engage in activities for boosting our ego. If we did not believe that we are this arbitrary concept then why are we continually engaging in ego-boosting activities? Do we see that? Really? If we saw it deeply and completely, our understanding in a real way would change.
When we say to ourselves, “I am sad”, we add unnecessary baggage to the “I am”. We are the “I am”. However the percentages are not there for the “I am”. What percentage of the time are we in the ego state? What percentage of the time are we sourcing the Source? The answer is the answer.
We need to acknowledge where we are at every moment. This allows us to see more clearly where attachment and the clinging to vagaries is as well as our responsibility to resolve this disparity. It always starts and ends with us. No one can walk the path for anyone else, period.
Can we see how much we identify and attach ourselves to an image of who we think we are? If our reaction is uninformed then we ultimately choose suffering. If our reaction is action, that is, the choice to Be, then we choose liberation.
It’s all in the Moment. We don’t want to believe that it is Moment by Moment, because that would mean that we would be putting more of our energy into ‘other’ than self-fulfilling enterprises (ego aggrandizement).
We delude ourselves so to escape the inevitability and instability of change. To Be in the Moment, is to be on the perennial edge. It feels too risky. And it is, because there is nothing to hold on to at any Moment.
Diagnostically, the above suffering is unambiguously pointing out, where we are stuck. Use the pain as a guide, not as a point of resistance. When we add things to the “I am”, we begin to compromise who we Are. Seeing why we are hurt in terms of identification/attachment, will lift the load more than you ‘think’.
Letting go of the stuff and ‘that’ struggle, is where our attention and concern can be directed more profitably.