There is noone here (or there) to throw under the bus. We say (and believe) that everything is happening to me. We always add ‘the me’. Does a ‘me’ exist to even add?!
When we add a ‘me’, we seemingly separate from what’s happening. But we Are what’s happening. Our own reality says there is no ‘me’ to add.
Conditioning and belief will disagree. But then who is it that requires us to add anything to anything? The truculence of old programming arises. But again, we still are ‘only’ what’s happening.
Tirelessly adding a ‘me’ is Sisyphean to existence. It ultimately goes nowhere but down. It rolls down and crushes and re-crushes the false self.
Having said the above, there still is a body and a character association that is not to be confused with true self. The unmeasureable energy inervating the body cannot be quantified except in the most superficial terms. Content dies while aliveness is eternal. The vehicles we use fall under the rubric of temporary phenomena.
So, when I didn’t get enough sleep last night, it was the carrier body that didn’t sleep. It’s like my Ford Fusion didn’t have enough gas. It is my vehicle and there is a consequence. But that has nothing to do with who I Am.
So now my car got a ticket. I didn’t get the ticket. But I have to address and handle the ticket.
I Am is before/after consequences and temporary phenomena.
Conceptualization and story telling result from reliving past experiences and/or reaching into an idea of future to pursue a different quality of experience. These ‘experiences’ are not an alive reality. There is no one and no ‘me’, certainly, to actually even find to have an experience. It Is ‘just’ experiencing. What is always there (Here) Is the Isness of ‘what’s happening’. When we slot the fullness of ‘experiencing’ into the smallness of ‘experience’ we lose the aliveness of ‘experiencing’.
‘Experiencing’ needs no ‘me’. We Are always experiencing! We Are always Being. Nothing needs to be added, ever. What is happening ‘to me’ really just happened without the imaginary ‘me’. And the ‘happening’ never goes into past tense as it Is always ‘happening’. There are no stops for the past that ultimately does not exist.
The ‘happening’ just keeps on ‘happening’ ad infinitum.
There is no story-telling in the awake field. The awake field is wordless everythingness. Ideas have no real meaning Here. Just Being and Happening Is enough.